Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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