But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
she told me i tasted like america
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
