Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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