You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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