On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize