i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
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