my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
