i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
