She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
