am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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