I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
