did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
