your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
