Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
