Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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