Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
