I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
