Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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