oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i think i have two assholes
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
