she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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