Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
