make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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