She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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