That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
