Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
