I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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