you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
If its not for food we ain't going out.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize
