It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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