Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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