...so i touched it.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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