Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize