I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
