Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
