google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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