taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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