So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Randomize
