a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
