hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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