yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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