Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Randomize
