Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize