Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
