Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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