No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
