Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
