I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This is my gift to your gina
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
