I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
