Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
