Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
