So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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